Thursday, August 11, 2011
Saturday, August 6, 2011
death??!
no pictures or anything for a skim with this post. i promise, if youll read this whole thing... youll love it. funny stories... funny stories all around. my life has been a serious joke lately. not a joke as in youre pathetic... joke as in serious, pure, humor. lets just start with this story first off..
okay so everyone knows i drive a honda civic hybrid, her names suzyq and shes been a great pal to have around. little brother ely has baseball all day everyday, but our parents have always taught us that working for something never hurt anyone so on the days ely doesnt have baseball untilo later in the day he goes and works at my uncles golf course, fox hollow. since he has weird hours he just would go down late the night before work and stay with my grandma and grandpa, wake up and work from like 4am to 12ish mowing greens and such. since my car got the better end of the stick as far as gas mileage goes i let him take my car down there. not an issue right?
nope, theres more...
so with me being the smart person i am, i took a summer class. i took a break from hair school (probably mentioned that?) and so i just am in "real" school working towards my associates. well im not stupid, so i knew i had to take an elective this year because lets be real... stevie? summer school? english or math? thats a fat NOPE! so i took a jewelry class (i dont even want to go into the hilariousness of this class) so anyways its just a monday tuesday wednesday class and just from 8 to 11. not bad at all. well sometimes ely takes my car, i wake up and bam no car. not an issue though right? because i could just take elys car, wrong again. ya see, slcc university/redwood high/13th grade.... they take their parking permits supppperrr seriously. trust me i got a ticket for driving elys car once so this particular day stevie had no car to go to school in and the fambam had already went on their merry way...
welp guess what, stevie's got an a+ boyfriend. so i call him up and he says okay ill come get you. he does and takes me to class. well im stupid and assume that he will just come when hes summoned to pick me up. oh awesome he has to take his sweet mother to her doctors appointment. in ogden. at 10. awesome my class gets out at 10:30 (tiny bit early) so im screwed. well to say the least poop hit the fan that morning and during class so i left class and immediately started bawling. sweet. and i wasnt even having "the time of the month"
so i think oh thats okay i just can walk to the hair school area of slcc and my friend emily can take me home no problem. i call her, she says shes on her way to school from her el houseo and that shouldnt be a problem. so i sit and wait, and wait, and wait... and finally she gets there and says uhh year i am going to cut my sisters hair today sorryt bro. okay cool man.
so i call cade as im sitting on campus, people walk by and think im an idiot and im just letting it happen. cades waiting for mother inside the car so hes trying to console me and hes saying stevie its fine ill just have paul (older brother) come get you. well guess what? brother and i dont see eye to eye all the time so im not even in the mood for him. so what do i do? decide to walk home. yep. so i do, and crying as i do it. (slcc isnt extremely far away so not a huge issue in the scheme of things) oh where is slcc you say? on redwood road, one of the busiest roads in all of history probably. but who cares, im an emotional wreck. well i get sick of walking and call my dad to see if hes in the area with work. he says why the heck are you walking. stop ill come pick you up! so i say sure fine and continue walking, cause hes not way close so i was like why not do something while i would be doing nothing. so i continue walking.
i call my dad after a few minutes just to see where he is and he says hes close. so i say okay because im now about to go through a busy intersection and i say no way to that and so i just plop my body right on this patch of grass and wait.
its not even the funny part yet people....
so im sitting and waiting and watching the cars go by and i look over and i see his guy with something on his neck and hes like coughing like he cant breath or something. and then he would be fine for a few minutes and then he would pull something and start all over againg. and then all the sudden he sees me watching him and this man starts to approch. thats fine right? he couldnt POSSIBLY be headed to talk to me? nope. wrong. he comes up to me. short man, (shorter then me) and a little bit on the thicker side. long dark hair, dirty, hadnt showered in a few hours (days weeks months... after a while is there really a difference??) and he comes up to me, no joke, and says "will you pull this tight around my neck so i can die?" (bandana aroung neck)
WAS HE SERIOUS!?!?!??!
my reply to him "uh.. no?"
him-"well, why not?"
at this point i stood up to talk to him because i felt vulnerable. he was like standing over me and i was just chillin on the ground and he was blah blahing about wanting to die? wtf?
so i just was like "i dont want you to die"
him-"well i do"
awkward silence and in my head im screaming "WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THAT?!?!?"
and because ive seen to many movies and read too many books and watched the news all to often i thought oh my gosh, this man is going to kidnap me and yikes! so i said the one thing that came to my mind... "my dads on his way"
him-"what?"
me-"yeah im leaving bye"
i started walking the other way and when i finally turned around and saw him taking off his belt and doing it up around his neck. wow. what should i do? let this man kill himself, uh no. so guess what i did? called 911. yep. i did. rescue hero is what you could call me i guess. talked to 911 dispatch, got transfered to the police etc. in the mean time father finally got me and i made my way home as i continued to talk to the po-po and the disbath people etc. maybe the reason i had all these trials was so i could save him? maybe all he was, was a loony just wanting to draw attention to himself (he succeded if this is what he wanted)...
i dont know if he ever caught the guy but my goodness... that was a crazyyyyyy wednesday.
okay so everyone knows i drive a honda civic hybrid, her names suzyq and shes been a great pal to have around. little brother ely has baseball all day everyday, but our parents have always taught us that working for something never hurt anyone so on the days ely doesnt have baseball untilo later in the day he goes and works at my uncles golf course, fox hollow. since he has weird hours he just would go down late the night before work and stay with my grandma and grandpa, wake up and work from like 4am to 12ish mowing greens and such. since my car got the better end of the stick as far as gas mileage goes i let him take my car down there. not an issue right?
nope, theres more...
so with me being the smart person i am, i took a summer class. i took a break from hair school (probably mentioned that?) and so i just am in "real" school working towards my associates. well im not stupid, so i knew i had to take an elective this year because lets be real... stevie? summer school? english or math? thats a fat NOPE! so i took a jewelry class (i dont even want to go into the hilariousness of this class) so anyways its just a monday tuesday wednesday class and just from 8 to 11. not bad at all. well sometimes ely takes my car, i wake up and bam no car. not an issue though right? because i could just take elys car, wrong again. ya see, slcc university/redwood high/13th grade.... they take their parking permits supppperrr seriously. trust me i got a ticket for driving elys car once so this particular day stevie had no car to go to school in and the fambam had already went on their merry way...
welp guess what, stevie's got an a+ boyfriend. so i call him up and he says okay ill come get you. he does and takes me to class. well im stupid and assume that he will just come when hes summoned to pick me up. oh awesome he has to take his sweet mother to her doctors appointment. in ogden. at 10. awesome my class gets out at 10:30 (tiny bit early) so im screwed. well to say the least poop hit the fan that morning and during class so i left class and immediately started bawling. sweet. and i wasnt even having "the time of the month"
so i think oh thats okay i just can walk to the hair school area of slcc and my friend emily can take me home no problem. i call her, she says shes on her way to school from her el houseo and that shouldnt be a problem. so i sit and wait, and wait, and wait... and finally she gets there and says uhh year i am going to cut my sisters hair today sorryt bro. okay cool man.
so i call cade as im sitting on campus, people walk by and think im an idiot and im just letting it happen. cades waiting for mother inside the car so hes trying to console me and hes saying stevie its fine ill just have paul (older brother) come get you. well guess what? brother and i dont see eye to eye all the time so im not even in the mood for him. so what do i do? decide to walk home. yep. so i do, and crying as i do it. (slcc isnt extremely far away so not a huge issue in the scheme of things) oh where is slcc you say? on redwood road, one of the busiest roads in all of history probably. but who cares, im an emotional wreck. well i get sick of walking and call my dad to see if hes in the area with work. he says why the heck are you walking. stop ill come pick you up! so i say sure fine and continue walking, cause hes not way close so i was like why not do something while i would be doing nothing. so i continue walking.
i call my dad after a few minutes just to see where he is and he says hes close. so i say okay because im now about to go through a busy intersection and i say no way to that and so i just plop my body right on this patch of grass and wait.
its not even the funny part yet people....
so im sitting and waiting and watching the cars go by and i look over and i see his guy with something on his neck and hes like coughing like he cant breath or something. and then he would be fine for a few minutes and then he would pull something and start all over againg. and then all the sudden he sees me watching him and this man starts to approch. thats fine right? he couldnt POSSIBLY be headed to talk to me? nope. wrong. he comes up to me. short man, (shorter then me) and a little bit on the thicker side. long dark hair, dirty, hadnt showered in a few hours (days weeks months... after a while is there really a difference??) and he comes up to me, no joke, and says "will you pull this tight around my neck so i can die?" (bandana aroung neck)
WAS HE SERIOUS!?!?!??!
my reply to him "uh.. no?"
him-"well, why not?"
at this point i stood up to talk to him because i felt vulnerable. he was like standing over me and i was just chillin on the ground and he was blah blahing about wanting to die? wtf?
so i just was like "i dont want you to die"
him-"well i do"
awkward silence and in my head im screaming "WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THAT?!?!?"
and because ive seen to many movies and read too many books and watched the news all to often i thought oh my gosh, this man is going to kidnap me and yikes! so i said the one thing that came to my mind... "my dads on his way"
him-"what?"
me-"yeah im leaving bye"
i started walking the other way and when i finally turned around and saw him taking off his belt and doing it up around his neck. wow. what should i do? let this man kill himself, uh no. so guess what i did? called 911. yep. i did. rescue hero is what you could call me i guess. talked to 911 dispatch, got transfered to the police etc. in the mean time father finally got me and i made my way home as i continued to talk to the po-po and the disbath people etc. maybe the reason i had all these trials was so i could save him? maybe all he was, was a loony just wanting to draw attention to himself (he succeded if this is what he wanted)...
i dont know if he ever caught the guy but my goodness... that was a crazyyyyyy wednesday.
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