watch with glittering eyes

sundance

2012-03-03T14:28:00.000-08:00

to say it was the perfect day for boarding is an understatement to say the least. it was amazing!!!!! i cannot even describe how beautiful it was!! so sunny, warm, good snow... ahhh!!!! i loved it. it was such a good day!!!! i even have a gnarly line from my goggles to prove it :) have a good rest of your weekend my friends!

sight for sore eyes

2012-03-02T21:56:00.000-08:00

since i work at sorenson and i sit in a cubicle allllll day, why get ready i say? especcccccially cause i have to be there at freaking 6 am!?!??!? i love it, everyone thinks i am the biggest bum in the world there and i dont even care. this day, i was looking exceptionally well and my friend couldnt resist a picture! oh, how marvelous i look. one day i will get a boyfriend who will think i am the most attractive person in the world and when i look like this, and then i will know i have met the man i am supposed to be with. especially when he wants it as his background on his phone to look at every chance he gets hahahah side note, notice my socks and how my toe is like hanging out. oh my, everything about this picture is fantastic.

me getting ready for my morning snowboarding session that didnt happen today. fml. i went to go up to brighton today and the canyons were closed, then they opened, and then it was full so i waited for like 29 millions years and finally flipped around because i wasnt even to the mouth of the canyon yet... i took this picture while waiting... i am so good at taking pictures of myself and you can tell i do it often because i am so skilled at getting my whole face...... hahahahahahhahaha

the bird

2012-03-02T17:40:00.000-08:00

snowbird. so much fun. i went with my friends andrew and josh. we has such a good time and i am so excited to just keep getting better and better!!!! tomorrow i am going to sundance, itll be so much fun all over again! happy snowboarding/skiing/whatever else :)

walk the walk

2012-03-02T17:16:00.003-08:00

When you finally get that call, meet that person, walk that walk, and live that dream, Stevie, do you think you'll even care that there were a few dark and scary moments in a journey that made them all possible? And, Stevie, won't you be glad you never settled for less?

Trust me, you won't even remember.

The Universe

king without a crown

2012-03-02T07:11:00.000-08:00

Strippin’ away the layers and reveal your soul
Got to give yourself up and then you become whole
You're a slave to yourself and you don't even know
You want to live the fast life but your brain moves slow
If you're trying to stay high, bound to stay low
You want God but you can't deflate your ego
If you're already there then there's nowhere to go
If you're cup's already full then its bound to overflow
If you're drowning in the water's and you can't stay afloat
Ask Hashem for mercy, and he'll throw you a rope
You're looking for help from God you say he couldn't be found
Searching up to the sky and looking beneath the ground
Like a King without his Crown
You keep fallin' down
You really want to live but can't get rid of your frown
Tried to reach unto the heights and wound bound down on the ground
Given up your pride and then you heard a sound
Out of night comes day and out of day comes light
Nullified to the One like sunlight in a ray,
Makin' room for his love and a fire gone blaze

the end

2012-03-02T07:05:00.000-08:00

rhcp

2012-03-02T00:28:00.000-08:00

under the bridge. a new friend of mine also shares my love for these guys, such good taste in music i tell ya!!!! adios. everybody pray that the canyons arent closed so i can go boarding ;)

hump day

2012-02-29T07:38:00.000-08:00

everybody who knows me, knows that i come from a family who is very much in tune with music. (mostly my dads side) we never just listen to a song at face value. we can carry on a conversation about the rhythm, beat, vocals but something i feel connected to are the lyrics. lyrics captivate, inspire, motivate, and make me feel fabulous all at the same time. when singing a song, i am always listening to what they are saying and then i interpret it for me to apply it to my life. i don't know why i cant just listen to a song for what it is, but i consider it a lovely talent of mine.
i listen to all sorts of music. my favorites although, is indie, alternative rock, and "underground rap"f you will. i honestly can listen to everything but those are my particular genres. anyways, i love music. when i hear certain songs i instantly am taken back to the first time i heard it, what i was doing, and more importantly how i felt. for example, every time i hear the song Can't Stop by the Red Hot Chili Peppers, i remember going to their concert with my dad and watching them jam out on stage and just being like, THIS IS AWESOME!!!! every time i hear that song i just get immediately happy and just love it. so when i am doing things like hiking, running, cleaning my room, snowboarding etc, i listen to certain types of songs that put me at ease with whatever may be going on in my life.
so while i was driving up snowboarding last week, i was enjoying the mountain and all its beauty (dont even get me started on how i feel when i get in the mountains, you all will be bored to tears by my awe) and i was getting pumped for snowboarding and a certain song came onto my shuffle that day and this line in the song really hit me.. i hope you all can get whatever you need out of it and enjoy the rest of your week :)

"Look, I've never had a dream in my life

Because a dream is what you wanna do, but still haven't pursued

I knew what I wanted and did it till it was done

So i've been the dream that I wanted to be since day one!"

venting

2012-02-26T17:35:00.000-08:00

arent they all beautiful!!?? <<<<<<
i know i am not the skinniest girl in the world, but i am also not fat. i honestly can say i love my body! i work out, but not to the point that i feel soooo guilty if i skip out on the gym once, or four times... hahah but seriously. of course i have my days that i think, if i could only have ______ and the blank continues on. but i, for the most part, am very happy with the way i look and i have so many friends that hate their bodies. why why why why? god gave us a very beautiful thing and i wish everyone thought that they were as pretty and beautiful as i think they are... it sucks though because guys today are so superficial and have it in their heads that all girls should wear nothing bigger then a size 4 and have huge boobs and a nice butt... when in reality it doesnt always happen like that for all of us and thats why so many girls are so hard on themselves is because they feel like boys wont ever like them because they are "bigger" than "normal" urgh it pisses me off. it makes me curious, if all of us had blindfolds on our whole lives and then when we meet someone who changes our life and we fall in love with them and after we are married then we could finally look at them, i wonder who we would all end up with? guys always say "i would rather have a way cool, chill and fun girl then have a girl who is a 10" (what does that even mean anyways?!?!) but then a girl will be interested in them who is cute and fun and guys will be like "oh, i dont know man, shes not really that attractive to me"... Uhmn, WHAT!?!?!?!?!?
anyways, every one (mostly girls) should read this article. its super good. :) happy eating and not dieting my friends!!!!

mad madam zel

2012-02-26T17:19:00.000-08:00

fun things have been happening as of lately... i have been hanging out with fun friends and out and about doing fun things! i have been shopping more this week then i have in the past six months, but who cares? i work hard for my money and i deserve to blow it every now and again. the past week had been me getting together for coffee with my friend (tea for me), swimsuit shopping, out to eat with girlfriends (pictures below) working, schooling, boarding, going on a way fun date last night, and just having some great fun :) i hope next week will be even more fabulous!

remember my friend rachel? the one who was in a car accident? well her attorney asked her to take pictures for this thing they were doing... little did she know, her face would be ALLLLLL over the slc valley... so hilarious.

meet my idiot friends, aka some of the best and most quality people you will ever know. they help me through everything in my life. and they truly are the only two people i can confide and tell anything to them and i know that they will never judge or question my motives. they tell me the straight up truth about what they think and it ends there. we all care about what the other one is doing in their life and i am so grateful to have these two losers in my life :)

and me...
the wonderful, marvelous, mad madam zel! i may be crazy, emotional, reluctant, indecisive, misleading, silly, confused, sloppy, flighty, scatter-brained, work too much (and play too hard) and very nonchalant.
but i am so incredibly at one with myself.
i am beautiful, hilarious, smart, strong and i always try my hardest to radiate only the best from myself to others.

and with that, i bid you farewell. i love you all, i hope you enjoy your week and i wish good energy to you, and yours. xoxo

Namasté

2012-02-22T15:44:00.002-08:00

why thank you good sir....

nine

2012-02-21T23:24:00.000-08:00

the nine hardest things that are inevitable things that we all have, do, and will continue to go through in this thing called life....

1-being questions when you yourself don't quite understand.
2-pretending to be innocent of what you know you are guilty...
3-trying to forget something you know you never will.
4-admitting you're wrong when you've been so insistent that you were right.
5-debating with yourself.
6-accepting the fact that somethings aren't meant to be...
7-trying to understand when you just can't.
8-realizing that you've been fooled after you have given you're whole truth.
9-parting and letting go of someone who made you believe in love again.

past

2012-02-21T19:33:00.000-08:00

i was over at my friend ali's last night and she was showing me some old pictures of jr high and high school and it just reminded me of how much fun i had during those years of my life. so i had to share some pictures with you all... enjoy :)

sjldgasd

2012-02-21T09:24:00.000-08:00

anddd here i am again!!! i haven't posted anything for a minute and its because, i have been so busy! its been lovely! i have worked a lot more, worked out, school and of course made some times for friend time!!! on friday i hung out with my friends and then hung out with my friend sean who was in town which was fun. saturday i worked allll day, saw ely off to his senior prom (sooo weird, i feel like i was doing that just yesterday!!!) and then i had a dinner with my momma and pops and then i hung out with my friends ali, derek, tiff, and jon. it was pretty fun, tiff got her tonsils out so we hung out there for a little bit, and then we went over to justin berrets house. it was really good to see everyone over there cause i hadn't seen them all forever!!!

life is so beautiful i cant even believe it! i am having so much fun with my everyday life, and i honestly couldn't ask for anything better.

with cade leaving it posed some interesting thoughts. about our next two years, whatever happens after etc. he told me not to wait, and i was hesitant at first but i decided it truly was for the best. after he left i talked to my mom and just basically said, when would be the right time for me to actually start going on dates --mind you, somebody would have to ask me to go first for me to be able to make that decision but whatever....hahaha-- and my mom said it prefect, she just said, well why wait? just do it. just because you go on a date with somebody, doesn't mean that you have to be with just that person.

i don't know why i hadn't thought of that before but its way true. i guess i am just a different kind of person so its harder for me. if i like someone, i just like them. ive never been someone who just dates everyone and feels okay about it, but i think that i should give it a try... right?! i have nothing else to lose!!!!

anyways thats all i have for now. today i have a date with my good friend khylee, we are going to park cafe and then going to hang out and do some shopping i guess. i dont know what is wrong with me lately but i have been in a shopping mood, and for those who know me, know that i dislike shopping. wednesday is work and school and then i am hanging out with my friends cotee and dimitra. and then the rest i dont really have a clue! i dont know what i am up to this weekend, but instead of making set in stone plans, i am going to wait it out, and hang out with whomever comes calling :)

this is a photograph by an artist i am particularly fond of. his art is interesting and it makes me look for it seems like, minutes beyond minutes. enjoy your tuesday :)

mj

2012-02-17T07:22:00.000-08:00

i got this quote from my friend jennas blog yearsssss ago!!! and i have saved it because i think its so true! i hope everyone has a happy monday!!!

"I don't find clothes sexy at all.
I find people sexy.
And I find personalities fascinating
and sexy and appealing
and charming.
So a sexy girl wrapped in a sheet is a sexy girl.
And an un-sexy girl in a low-cut dress
is still an un-sexy girl."
- Marc Jacobs

countdown begins

2012-02-16T17:57:00.000-08:00

so, rather then bore you with millions of pictures-one after another- i decided to group them all together and share whats been going on lately in my life....

cade and i went snowboarding together for our first time. hes loadddssss upon loadddsssss better then myself but it was so much fun being with him up in the mountains. the mountains is our zen time. i am more of a hiker and hes more of a snowboarder but it was so much fun to be able to share this together before he left.

our last date night. with me working at the flower patch, i never know when i will be able to get off to be able to plan to do anything the few weeks before valentines day. luckily i have a cutting technique class on fridays that goes til about 7ish so we were able to plan our last date together. he wouldnt tell me where we were going and i was so excited. he finally told me that we were going to the melting pot, and i freaked out!!!!!! we had the most amazing time together downtown walking around while we waited for our reservation time. the food was absolutely delicious!!! from start to finish it was fantastic, i honestly couldnt have asked for a better last date with my cadence.

my dear friend derek got baptized and i was so happy for him. he was literally glowing the entire time and i am so glad that he was able to belong to someone that made him have an ounce of hope. he deserves it more then anybody and i love him so much! congrats durkkkk!!!

cade was devastated that he had to say goodbye to his part time girlfriend veronica. i was so glad that he got to go on one last ride on her before he packed her up and stored her away for two years.

on saturday, i got off just in time to go to my brothers baseball banquet. cade needed a break from writing his farewell talk so we went for a little bit. my family was so glad we both could make it last second.

the farewell. i had so many friends come and support cade as well as me. it was so nice to see friends and family there on his special day.

these girls are my everything (minus kirst, she couldnt come) but they came because they love cade, but they also love me so much. they are the best friends that i could ever ask for and the two years will go by so quickly with them to help me through and distract me as always :)

my bestest friend. oh how i love him so. he is my rock. he is the all time best thing that has, or will happen to me. i love him so much it hurts! i am so proud of him, and i cannot wait to hear all his crazy stories through letters!!!

our last night to cuddle and smooch :) the day before he got set apart we hung out until wee hours of the night. although it was our last night to kiss and such, we didnt do much of that... we mostly talked, talked and talked. about everything. about our past, present, what the next two years might bring, and the years after that. i love him so much. i will miss him terribly, but he is doing what he does best, his quiet confidence speaks louder then my loud mouth ever would. he leads by example and although he isn't the most aggressive, he is so powerful in his actions and deeds.

and there ya have it. talk to me, text me, hang out with me.

i love you all, and goonight. xoxoxo stevie

no way

2012-02-16T17:19:00.000-08:00

this videos kind of creepy but the songs amazing... endulge.

weekly update

2012-02-03T14:22:00.000-08:00

I have had a busy last week and it continues to get busier.
Lets see… where to begin…

i stevie hansgen snowboard. yep, you heard me. ive been taking lessons up at brighton and have loved every minute of it. cade and i are going sometime next week.... so that will be my true test, if i can keep up with his proffesional skills :)

The next adventure was mini golf. I LOVE MINI GOLF. Soo fantastic. Cade and I love going and get kind of competitive…. Ive won the last 2 times we went, and he beat me this time. Urgh whatever. We went to Hollywood connections this time cause we couldn’t think of any other places that were indoor. It was really ghetto but we had fun regardless.

My friend gave me and a few of our girlfriends free tickets to go see mission impossible…whatever number it was…. In imax at the gateway. I honestly went because it was free, because I am no a fan of those sorts of movies but needless to say, it was actually pretty good. Of course there were pictures taken after of all of some of us. Honestly… I don’t know who any of these people are except for the 3 on the left of me and the one on my right. Oh well it was fun anyways.

this was my friend brittneys birthday. we all went to settabellos and then to her new apartment after. it was so much fun!!! this was us singing happy birthday to her and she was being a creeper while we were singing. hahah i love her!

my friend aubree left on her mission on wednesday. her mom has a little surprise party for her the friday before she left! there were more people there before but we forget to take a picture until after. it was so good seeing them all again!

cade and I made our first dinner together and it was delicious. I took pictures of before, but was too excited to eat it to take a picture of our after … it was so good. We made pesto and chicken stuffed pasta, with the red lobster rolls (you know they’re to die for) corn, and cade made a cinnamon streusel pizza… equally as delicious. We had wayyy too much fun together doing it.

sundaze

2012-01-29T13:52:00.000-08:00

sunday is rest time, and if i dont get my homework done, its study time. i was a procrastinator this week, therefore study time it is. today i went to my friend aubrees farewell. she did such a good job speaking and i know she will do an amazing job in fresno. well, im done procrastinating and done getting side-tracked by the internet world. im off to write my english essay.. due tomorrow.

happy sunday too all xoxo

-------------

“My skin is kind of sort of brownish pinkish yellowish white.
My eyes are greyish blueish green,
but I'm told they look orange in the night.
My hair is reddish blondish brown,
but its silver when its wet,
and all the colors I am inside have not been invented yet.”

― Shel Silverstein, Where the Sidewalk Ends

eggggggs!!!

2012-01-27T09:08:00.000-08:00

my all-time FAVORITE restaurant! i am going there with my friend Khylee today, and i couldnt be more excited. its my go-to for brunch/breakfast food. if anyone says "hey lets go to breakfast" i say EGGS IN THE CITY!!!! it has never failed me, and so therefore i am happy to go there time and time again. i usually get the Mexican or Greek skillets, and it is fantastic! ahhh i am so excited. and then after that i have school and then my cutting technique class after that. Once im finished with that, cade and i are going on a date to a place we both have never been to, called the the copper onion. i am so excited because we both have hear raveeee reviews on how fantastic this place is... so i couldn't be more thrilled to go there with my dearest cadence.
a few days ago i got a letter from matthew and i couldn't believe how happy i was to receive a letter from him! hes in the mtc, and he says hes happy he went but the mtc kind of sucks.... urgh. i dont blame him though, doing church everyday wouldn't be the funnest thing everyday but i am happy hes doing okay!
a friend of mine has also recently decided to get baptized. his names derek and im happy for him. he invited me to go to one of the missionary discussions with him and it was a cool experience to see derek connecting with what they were teaching. it also was cool to look at the missionaries and realize, wow, that's what cades going to be doing. it was kind of funny! after derek and i went over to our friend aubrees house for her surprise party thing... because she also is going on a mission. (do you not see how missions are consuming my life now?!?!)
after that cade came to pick me up and we were going to make this thing on pinterest we thought looked really good, but then we couldnt find the recipe cause his computers lame and so we ended up talking.... and then falling asleep on the ground. wow we are super popular and really lively people. hahahah anyways, we will redeem ourselves tonight with yummy food all around! have a good weekend bloggers. xoxoxstevie

mr merica

2012-01-23T19:01:00.000-08:00

missionary. urgh, the word still sits weird in my mouth. i love it, i know there's no where else in the whole would that i would rather him be then serving a mission, its just hard to not be selfish and want him to stay and continue to have fabulous adventures with me. while he prepares to leave, it has put a lot of things into perspective for us. people ask us funny, yet normal questions like... are you waiting? do you want her to wait for you? are you guys going to get married blah blah blah.

no im not necessarily waiting for him... im going to date.

he wants me to enjoy my two years as well as his.

and marriage, were 20.... why would we even think of such things?!

bottom line, i love him. a ton. someone totally knew what they were doing when they made that kid.... the perfect fit for me. he gets me like no body else ever has. we both enjoy little things. thats the perfect word to describe us... enjoy. its not some crazy, mad rush of passion. it never has been. we have always been just fact, i love him,he loves me, we love each others company and what we both are about with and without each other. theres no room for the other fluff. sure, he makes me happy, makes me want to be a better person everyday. makes me want to be temple worthy, makes me want to embrace every moment, makes me want to be honest, makes me want to just be anything that i feel. he treats me like no body has ever treated me before. he's the best. one of my favorite memories with him is we were driving, (dont remember where, probably somewhere lame like state street haha) and a song came on, (don't remember what one) and it felt like we were in a music video. like everything could just stop and stay still forever and it wouldn't even matter. and i just looked at him driving, i dont know what he was thinking, but i just looked over and said, "this moment is perfect, i am so content with just being alive right now and i could relive the simplicity of this moment over and over again forever." ill never forget his face, he looked at me, smiled, reached for my hand and we went on driving. life is so awesome. i know i'm going to ramble on about him for the next little while, and who knows however long after that... even though i dont know what the next journey brings us, i just know that i wouldnt want to have been through the past few years without him xoxo

this isnt like "our song" or anything creepy like that, this is just a mutual favorite song as of lately. its an oldie, but goodie and its a good mood song for driving, starting your day, ending it, and anything that may fall inbetween :)

queeeeshhhions

2012-01-22T14:58:00.000-08:00

Finish this thought: "If I could change one thing about myself..."
if i could change one thing about myself it would probably be that i wish i wasnt so 'one strike you're out' type of person. i feel like i am very open to having people come into my life as friends and stuff, but then once they do one thing that is on my Dont Ever Do list, then i kind of just cut them off of my friendship. which is super lame, because i would hate if people did that with me. okay, im not doing it again from this moment on.

Describe an animal that you identify with strongly. Why do you have a special feeling about this animal?
i feel like i had a special connection with my dog Roo. it was like i could just look at him and he knew what i was thinking. seriously, the most lovable and comforting dog ever. when i was like 5 or 6 i remember my parents getting upset with me about something and i just ran outside crying. it was a hot summer day and i just ran to my dog and buried my head in his body. i just sobbed into his fur until no more tears were to be had. i would come home from school and swing on the swing-set in our backyard and talk to him about what happened. i would sing to him and everything. i miss him so much! i hope to have a dog someday that i connect like that with.

Tell about what triggers anger in you
gosh. im such an irritable person so i dont know if i can pinpoint something that really gets me going bar-none.... i think as of lately i have become super peeved by people who seem to constantly be indifferent. i am really opinionated, so i have a hard time believing when someone says that they dont care, how how how people?!?!?!

What is your favorite kind of weather? Why?
honestly, i dont have a specific favorite. it seems like it changes often. my favorite seasons are winter and fall. but a warm, summer day is amazing. i love rainy days when i can lay in bed and read, i love snowy days when everything just seems still and quiet, hmm i love a wide variety. i live in the right state for that i guess!!

Describe a time when you really felt fear. What made it a frightening time? How did you feel when it was over?
i automatically think of this time in my life, which you can see pictures in this post. that was a really scary thing that happened to paul and rachel and i still am so grateful that they are okay!

Write about what you didn't do this weekend.
this weekend i was super sick. i went to the doctors, went to school, came home and slept, watched a movie with cade and slept some more. on saturday i was sick again, slept forever, went to work, went to my friends birthday dinner and back to her apartment, sat in a hot tub for a little and then went home and slept. today i have slept some more, blogged, homework and cleaned my room. if all this sleeping doesnt help me, i dont know what will!!!!

If you could go back in time, where/when would you go and why?

so funny, i just wrote about this in my journal. there are so many cool things that would have been awesome to witness in history. gettysburg address, the civil war, the renaissance era, etc. i think something that i would have found interesting would be ww2 or woodstock. i know two completely different things. ww2, just because it would be interesting to see what it would really be like to live through all of that, and woodstock because i love music and concerts and it would be super cool to see that era of music and see what it did for people back then. plus i would get to see my main-boy Jimi Hendrix do his thing live!!!!!!

manifestation.

2012-01-22T12:29:00.000-08:00

Like I have said in previous posts, im not one for ”resolutions.” People forget them, push them aside, decide they’re too hard or difficult and live like the same way. I, for a while have been reading many books on positive thinking to sum it up. Ive read and watched movies on The Secret, read many Toltec Philosophy books and so on… Although I do believe that there is power in positive thinking, I also am LDS, and believe that through God, these things are possible, not just me aimlessly hoping for things and putting no work into it. However, some of their ideas in the books and movies that I have watched, have had interesting tatics on how to keep the dreams, wants, and desires alive. Some recommend making a Dream Board, some have you list what you want and then write and such inside of you for why you really want these things and so forth… I may try those one day but for me, I decided to make a list for things that I want to Manifest in my life.

The definition of manifest is…

1-clear or obvious the the eye or mind

2-display or show (a quality or feeling) by ones acts or appearance

Interesting. So I write down a list of things that I want to be better at, continue to do, and also a version of a short-term “bucket list”. There are so many things that I see people doing or things that I randomly think of and I think, dang. If only I could do that, Uh… HELLO!!!! Why cant i?!? so I made this list of things I want to do. It has already helped me a lot. I have, in some way already accoplished some of the things on this list. Example, I deleted my facebook (… a month ago maybe?) because it isn’t productive and it takes away from being in the moment. And so on and so forth. I am going to write in my journal of thee experiences, blog about them, and also put this list where I can see it every day and be reminded of what is important to me, and who knows, maybe I will add to it as time goes on! Happy Sunday xoxo

and the verdict is...

2012-01-20T11:27:00.000-08:00

asthma. after going to the doctors, doing a breathing treatment, and all the other lame stuff... thats what it is. when he said that i just looked at him and was like..what!? howwww?!?! but he later explained that its not something that means i will have it for life. it just means that because i also have a sinus congestion (common cold) that sometimes your muscles contract. making it harder for you to breath because it closes your airways and such. i have basically been having asthema attacks with my coughing fits and so thats where the inhaler comes in. i have to take 2 puffs of that thing every 3-4 hours and it will/should go away after a few days. if it doesn't then that might mean other things. the downside is that the medicine they game me makes me feel soooooo strung out and jittery. i dont like it. i am shaking so bad right now its ridiculous, maybe now i know a little bit about how people on meth feel, aka dont do it cause its like my body has too much energy i cant even handle it right now.. he also said/suggested that for the next few days, i only try and eat soups and such...cade and i now have an excuse to go to Zupas today. yayyyy its a happily ever after!!!! :) happy breathing today people!

sicky

2012-01-20T08:42:00.000-08:00

urgh, as some/most of you know, i am super sick. i have been for two weeks on sunday. so weird, cause it started out with like a mild cough, nothing serious at at all. it then began to get worse and worse. i as coughing literally every 1 minute. the weird thing about it was that my throat wasnt hurting. it was just a cough, i didnt even have like any flem or anything.sorry if that was too much info but yeah anyways.. so it just got worse and worse. itook medicine and such and just slept, A LOT!!!! i didnt go to the doctors because i figured it was just a super bad cold. (all of you also know that i NEVER get sick. i git little colds here and there but nothing that lasts longer then 2 days, i dont ever remember feeling this bizare, in my life!!) and then i stopped coughing as much, but got REALLY congested. now my nose is all stuffed up, i feel like i cant breath really well and such... this is the worse! the thing is, i dont feel sick. at all. i feel fine. i just cough every now and again but it feels like nothing mostly, until nighttime. when i lay down, i cough for like 2-3 minutes straight. it makes me cry because i cant breathe while im coughing so i get nervous. its awful. my parents think i have bronchitis...i sure hope not. i keep calling the doctor and leaving messages but he wont call back. grrr i am so frustrated. anyways,thats my sad tale, wish me luck!

ramblings

2012-01-19T17:22:00.000-08:00

What did you do today?
worked, watched a movie, got ready, hung out with my girlfriends!

What is your favorite cartoon character?
i love dory from finding nemo, is that considered a cartoon?

What kind of phone do you have?
just a sweet pantech. cheap. verizon. non-internet phone

What are you currently hearing right now?
my father watching tv in his room

Were you happy when you woke up today?
meh, it was kind of early, but i didnt mind too much. im kind of a morning person!

Who was the last person to have their arms around you?
my mother just hugged me before she left

What kind of mood are you in today?
im sicky still. so just meh, content

Have you ever thrown a shoe at someone?
no, its never been necessary... is it ever necessary?

What was the reason you last cried?
saying bye to matt before he went to the MTC

Do you think you'll be married in 10 years?
i hope so, i'd be thirty by then!

Do you still talk to the person you were dating 4 months ago?
yes i surely do, everyday.

Have you ever been nice to someone who treated you like crap?
yeah, its usually easier that way.

When was the last time you laughed?
two seconds ago, talking to kenz

What are you anticipating the most in the next 6 months?
... :) i will anounce it when im good and ready!

thoughts?

2012-01-19T13:18:00.000-08:00

"no man knows how bad he is till he has tried very hard to be good.

a silly idea is current that good people do not know what temptation means,

this is an obvious lie.

only those who try to resist temptation know how strong it is.

after all, you find out the strength of the German army

by fighting against it, not by giving in.

you find out the strength of a wind

by trying to walk against it, not by lying down.

a man who gives in to temptation after five minutes,

simply does not know what it would have been like an hour later.

that is why bad people, in one sense, know very little about badness.

they have lived a sheltered life by always giving in.

we never find out the strength of the evil impulse inside us until we try to fight it"

interesting. i dont know if i necessarily believe in this quote but i certainly found it interesting.... my thoughts about this have always been, there is not testimony without a test. how do you know that something feels right, if you have felt something wrong before? how do you know happiness if you have never been sad. how can you call yourself grateful, if you feel you have lived without. this quote makes sense to me though, what are your thoughts on it? i would be interested to know!

ode to mattchu

2012-01-18T22:42:00.000-08:00

I knew this day had to come eventually. my two best friends are leaving within one month of each other, crazy! Matthew bauer, so weird! When I first met this kid, it was in jr high with my friend Jordan Jenkins. I didn’t think much of it, I knew who he was in high school, I would see him around but never really got to know him. It wasn’t until I started hanging out with cade and paul, that I really did begin to get to know him. SO FUNNY! Seriously, we could laugh about anything, and it was always a good time. We all lived in the same neighborhood and we were in the same ward together. We were doing things we shouldn’t have been doing, and we definitely weren’t being any sort of help to each other, but then again, why would we be? We thought we were all having the times of our lives. No cares in the world… well, then Matt moved out with our friend Berrett and his cousin. We still saw him a lot because we went over to the apartment often… well, when cade decided to go on a mission, I can’t lie I was kind of bugged. Why would he want to stop having fun and hanging out with all of our friends for a weird thing like church. Sure, I believed it all was true but I didn’t find it necessary to stop our current lifestyle. We weren’t doing anything that crazy… anyways I slowly came around and realized that the life I was living, wasn’t for me either so we slowly distanced ourselves from those situations. It was really good because I saw an instant change in my life. I was more productive, more motivated, genuinely happier, and at that moment, I knew I had made the right decision, and cade felt the same. Well, it was great during the week, but when the weekend would roll around, everyone of our usual friends, would all go to Matt and Berretts to hang out. Cade and I would go once every month or so, but not even that usually. We just got to the point when it wasn’t fun watching the same people, do the same things and act the same way. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done, to stop hanging out with the people I became so close with. It wasn’t because they weren’t awesome people, because they were. It was just hard for cade and I to keep saying no, and not feeling on the same level as everyone else. It was really hard because they were my best friends for so long, but we had to give it up. Well, a few months went by and then matt told us he moved out. HUGE SHOCKER!!! And from that point on, he never looked back. He stopped giving into the temptations and got ready to serve an lds mission. I couldn’t believe it. I was sooooo ecstatic! Well, the rest is history! From that moment on, we were inseparable. We did everything together. And it wasn’t even like it was cade and I and then the 3^rd wheel matt, it was just like we all three were best friends. We talked about everything together, life, family, friends, future hopes and dreams, jobs, frustrations, happiest moments in our life…. Everything. We became each others life lines. If any of us ever thought of giving up, there were always two people helping them back out of the funk that they were in. we laughed together, cried together, yelled at each other… the whole thing. We all couldn’t believe that in a few short months, all of us would be separated, but then again not really. We all were stronger people. We knew that in 2 years, we would all be back to hanging out and being best friends all over again. on friday night, the celebrations began! we went to dinner at (you all know this) but my favorite Bonsai! matt hasnt been there and he was sick of all of us talking about how delicious it was so he said that was the one thing he wanted to do before he left! haha Matt had his farewell talk on sunday and did amazing. Looking back one year ago, he is a changed man, and I can only imagine what the next two will do for him. We hung out at his house after with some of our friends and talked, he came and hung out with us Monday night, and then Tuesday afternoon, matt and I went to mcdonalds for our last ice cream sundae, and mcdouble with big mac sauce. It was so nice to be able to hang out and talk once again but it was beginning to sink in that we only had a few hours left. He dropped me off and asked if cade and I would come to his setting apart that night, Of course we said yes. Matt bore his testimony and I felt the spirit so strongly. At the end, he turned to cade and I and told us, that he knew he wouldn’t have been able to go on a mission if it wasn’t for us two. Cade and I were already bawling, so you can imagine what happened after he said that. Right after he bore his testimony he got up to get set apart, his sister and mom said quick, you have to hug stevie. Matt and I just looked at each other and started cryin again. We both hugged and I knew I was having to say goodbye to my best friend. After we went to his house with paul, maddi, mikey and parker and just hung out and spent the last few hours we could with him. We finally left and that was it. I texted him right when I got home and sent him my testimony. We talked back and forth for a minute but then stopped. I thought that was going to be the last time we talked until we wrote letters. He then texted me out of the blue while i was at work…

Matt-hey, I love you and thanks for being the best friend ever.

Me-I love you too matt, don’t forget it!

Matt-I couldn’t forget about you

Me-stop this nonsense, youre making me cry at work!

Matt-im sorry L I had to say it though

Me- love ya to meridia and back!

Matt-hahahhaha thanks, youre the best

Me-no, im not!

Matt-haha, but I love you, im about to get dropped off. Write to me and pray for me.

Me-I will matt, love you.

Matt-thanks, see you in 2.

Uh, yeah I was crying at work. It just hit me again, that he was going to be gone forever. No more late night chats, no more temple together, no more rancheritos, no more funny texts, no more tanning buddies, no more mcdonalds, no more shopping, not for 2 years. I am so happy and grateful that hes going on a mission though, matt has a way about him that will make everyone feel special. He will do so well and I am so excited to hear about his successes! Urgh, enough of this nonsense… one down, one to go, wish me luck! J

cade, myself, matt, paul and maddi at bonsai

berrett, cade, me, matt, maddi and paul at matts house after his farewell talk on sunday

at his setting apart. this was after we all were crying so all of our eyes look a little red and squinty

see you in two matt!!!!!!!

interesting.

2012-01-13T10:40:00.000-08:00

this is so good. i really like the way he says this!

jazz vs lakers

2012-01-12T08:00:00.000-08:00

my friend maddi's father works for the jazz as a promoter/marketing somthing or other... but she texted me and asked if cadence and i would like to come. i said, of course because i love outtings of all sorts and shapes! well, i then later found out that they were playing the lakers! to some of you, that would be a life changing moment. for me, i just was happy to be going to see a good game. hugeeee peeve of mine, is when one team is winning by like a million points. its not close, or intense, or nothing. so cade and i drove up and met them after my class and we had an enjoyable time. the lakers won in overtime, but that was okay. i was on the big screen a few times dancing by myself and cade was embarrassed. he still loves me though! anyways, here are some pictures :)

more people were to the left of maddi that we came with, but they were too busy talking to be in the picture, shame on them.

11th row, not a bad view at all!

me, continuing to try and be on the screen! hahahahah cade couldnt stop laughing at my determination so he captured the moment well.

modeling?

2012-01-10T22:28:00.000-08:00

modeling, me, nevvvvvaa evea! well, my friend katie who organizes events at the salt palace was needing help to find "models" for wedding dresses at the bridal showcase. so i said i would help her out. it was really fun, i knew a lot of the girls doing it so it was a good time! we went to all the different bridal places participating, got fitted and then basically just had to show up. now, i know im outgoing, but when i was walking on the runway thing, i seirously was hilarious. cadence, mother, and father all came to watch me. my dad recorded me and it was so funny, i was stiff as a board. i would turn when i was instructed backstage but nothing else. hahahahah i should post it because all the other girls that have been doing it FORRREVERRRRR were all into it. they were twirling, kicking their train... and me. walking, being lame hahahah it seriously cracks me up. when we got there we were supposed to have them do our hair and makeup... uh yeah, i hate people touching my hair. i let people color it etc but when it comes to actually styling, yeah no. and makeup. dont even get me started. people make me look like a straight up hooker. ive been models for make up and such before cause i guess i have a certain kind of eye that is tricky? (whatever that means??? basically i have little squinty ones, thats all i am aware of.) but i have agreed before and people who have been doing makeup professionally have done it and they do it the correct way with foundation, conceler, blemish something yaaddda yaddaa.... and i get done and take a look at myself and cry. ahh freeakks me out. i just wear mascara on the daily. nothing else. i put on moisturizer for the sun and just so its not gross flaky dry, but other then that nothing else of i will look like a racoon. so long story short, i did my hair and makeup with one other girl who felt the same way and everyone else got fancy with the pros! i wish i wasnt a freak about it but oh well.... anyways, here are all the pics from it.. enjoy :)

after makeup slash hair was done before we put our dresses on for the first show!

amanda and myself

theres a better picture of this one, but it was one of my favorites!

dress number one, vera wang! it was different bt my second favorite that i wore! i felt so comfortable and it was flattering on me, if i do say so myself!

eyes closed, sweet. no but i loved this dress. like i could have wore this to my homecoming in high school and i would have been okay with it!

my vera dress was the first i wore, so thats why i have like a million more in that then any other one! good this it was a favorite!

not my favorite, everything about this wasnt okay. color, cut... idk it just wasnt a sensation to myself

FAVORITE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ah, you know those clothes you try on and you think, wow, this was made for my body?! that was how this dress was for me! the only thing i wasnt in love with, was the little flowery, diamond detailing you would see up close. but from far away, it was perfect. this was my mom and cades favorite too!!!!!

huge, poofy, heavy, not me. but it was suuuuper pretty!!!!! it fit me pretty well too! i liked it a lot, but not anything i would choose for myself!

like i said before, this was the 2nd favorite. i am more of a fan of slender dresses. this one was super cute in the back, it went lower and into a V cut. i liked it a lot, but again.... the flower detailing.. i dunno what it is, it just reminds me of little girls. like flowery blah. i dunno?

we had girls that came and helped us get changed quickly, it was so nice to have them there! this is a girl who helped me, she was so nice!!! (ahhh my favorite dress again :) )

my cute friend that i love, amanda! shes a mother and looks SOOO GOOD right?!?!?!

annnddd my number one fan! ahhh i love him!!!! he comes and supports me in everything i do! he got a pass with all of his friends to go up to park city to board. like a free day pass, and he didnt really think it was going to be that great, cause he has a season pass to canyons and there has been really crappy snow, and seriously the ONE day it snows in utah, was my opening day for the modeling thing. i figured he wouldnt come and he would just come to the 2 on saturday. NO, hecame with my mom! he left early just to watch me make a fool of myself in front of everything. hes the best ever. i love him soooo much!!!!!!! xoxooxoxoxoxox and, im ending on that note ;)

365 days

2012-01-08T14:50:00.000-08:00

cade and i have been together oficially for one year as of janurary 3rd 2011!!! it was kind of funny because when cade and i were both dating, we both kind of found the defining a little silly when it came to relationships. we thought, we both life each other, and only each other.... why do we have to talk about the specifics of it all?? well, as we continued to "date/be together" we went on a date and went back to his house after to watch a movie and he just said, "i cant take it anymore i just want to be together officially!!"...and here a year later, here we are! its been one of the best seasons of my life. we have gone out, done, and seen so many things together. we go and do so many fun, exciting things together, but we also love the simplicity of staying home, and just enjoying each others company! we were having fun, hanging out with people, doing our things and then we were just talking one day and said he decided he was going on a mission. i was so bugged. i mean, i knew it was the right thing for him to be wanting to do but i was be selfish and i couldnt understand why, if things were going so great, would he want to go on a lame mission and leave me behind. well after a lot of talks, time on my knees praying, and long thoughts to myself, i realize that i knew it was going to be okay. there was still so many things that i needed to go out and do on my journey, and if we were supposed to be together then we would be. i know with all of my heart, that i love him so much. no one can make me laugh as hard as this kid. hes so nice to me and other people around him. hes always helping my dad, grandparents, his family, everyone before he thinks about what he wants. i love him so much! :) for our "one year" i made him a book of our pictures together with different songs that reminded me of him. he made me dinner! it was soooooo cute, and delicious! he also got me a sweet necklace. he ordered it but it hadnt gotten there but he told me about it! apparently its silver and it just has a simple leaf on it.... he knows me so well!!!! i seriously love him so much! hes the man for me :)

newone

2012-01-08T14:14:00.000-08:00

2012. who knew. it seems like every year comes, and goes. faster then the last one.. its a beautiful thing to me... especially this year. although "a new year" comes...nothing really changes. i mean yeah the no-brainer stuff like, the months start over. we are (typically) in the dead ofwinter counting down months until its warm again. but aside from that,nothing is really THAT different. people make big deals, resolutions that every one seems to forget mid-february, and everyone just seems to make such fusses. they look back on the previous year and contemplate if they really did live it to the fullest. it is good for a reflection, and a self evaluation and helps you realize what you may want to consider for the next year. pictures speak louder then words for me and so i will reflect on 2011.... ps these pictures arent in order cause my laptop sucks so i will jump bck and forth ....sooooorrry!

anyone who knows me, knows i love to go out and do fun things. we went to airborne like in september? and it was so much fun, you guys already saw the post of all of these but oh well :)

urgh, so sad. my friend connor used to live up at uvu and so we would skype all of the time and it was always joyous!

easter eggs! my parents went out of town so cadence came over and did eggs with my little brother sam and i! it was super fun!

festval of colors! everyone knows that this is. i went this year in april and oh boyy what a joy.

indian party. i love these girls, they are my supporting shoulder, laughing buddies, and everything inbetween. we always are doing fun things and this particular time was liz's birthday!

you all also know im a concert goer. all concerts of all shapes, generas, and sizes! this one was ke$ha.... not my favorite one but the people watching there was top notch!

cades broter got married in march this year.

urgh, the ultimate nightmare. when i got my fernectomy. the worst weekend of my life.

this was a date we went on last year was when cade decided to ask me to be his girlfriend. :) haha honestly, the best decision of my life. i love him so much. looking at our past year there were so many things that made him standout among te rest. we havent broken up once. (big deal from the last bf i had) takes me out once a week, we hae yet to get into a huge fight, i could go on and on...... :)

BEST CONCERT EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dirty heads, my love for them will grow forever

one of my best friends moved to denver. last year around march :(

two of my good friends got engaged :) congrats!

another concert. blue scholars. sooooo goooddd

birthday dinner with my frrieeenndssss

cabin fun with my two best friends and other friends liz and eliza

started senios theory at school which meant I WAS ALMOST DONE!!!!

december13, i finished :)

good friends came and celebrated

and took me out to dinner afterwards

i becameso much closer with my friend kenzi this year. i love her so much and its so funny how long you know someone before you both actually take the time and realize how close you could have been the whole time!

this year for halloween cade and i were peach and mario :) somuch fun!

my friend jon came home from his mission, it was so good to finally see him again!

random, fun, spontaneous nights were had :)

powellapalooza, a trip i will never forget!

connor left on his mission to el salvador. hes doing awesome! it was so hard to say goodbye to such a good friend!

cades sister got married in july

i have such an amazing job! all of you know how i am a florist and i have been since i was 16, but i finally was promoted and allowed to go into the wedding department. its been a favorite for sure! its so much fun interacting with the brides and hearing all of the different ideas that are available! this was me setting up for our la calle' show, it was so great!

mother and i went and visited my grandma in st george, i love and miss her so much

on my dads side of the family, all the girls (minue idania and janni)went to st george to go to a show at tuachan theare, it was my second time and i loved it!

for cades birthday we went to another concert, shocker! hahahah it was shwayze, slightly stoopid and rebelution.

maddi and i got the opportunity to go to the ranch up in starvalley.i had already been so it was fun taking maddi up there and showing her around. i love it up there its beautiful!

i took cade to a hansgen favorite... strawberry days! i love going to this rodeo, ive went since i was little so it was super fun to show cade how its done :)

as a family, we all went to elys baseball touney in grand junction colorado. this is where my mom and dad first lived when they first got married so we got to go around and see all the places that they ate at and lived at down there. oh yeah, and ely won first place, whoot whoooooottt!!!

taylorsville days is always a favorite, we went 2 times this year and it never gets old!

taylorsville days again, they had an amazing firework show. like seriously, the best one ive ever seen. it went on for at least 30 minutes!

cade took me on a date downtown, he did so many fun things for me this year.

tennis is a favorite activity we did. among bike rides, longboarding, hiking, scootering, rollerblading, walks, etccccc

another girl outing.

megans wedding again

i bought cade this fish.... Normin for his birthday, hes sweet huh!?

temple lights outting

our sweet gingerbread house :)

and the news is...

2012-01-08T14:09:00.000-08:00

McAllen Texas Mission.
Spanish Speaking
leaves.... February 15th 2011.

WHAHOO!!! ive never had so many emotions run through my body at one time. there was excitement, saddness, nervous... EVERYTHING! elder merica, i like it :) at first i was sad because he left so soon, but the sooner he leaves, the sooner he will return! the day he opened it was december 27th, and he was sooooo sick. he has been snowboarding earlier and got the flu in the middle of a run! so when he opened it i couldnt tell if he was happy about it or not, he opened it and then went straight to bed (hense no pictures)...the next day he felt a million times better and was soooo excited. we were both reading through all of the things he needed to get, reading the information about his mission presidents, everything! i am so proud andhappy for him! the next 2 years are going to be tough, but theres no where on earth i would rather him be, then on this mission!!!!
my family through a party for him to celebrate... all mexican food, virgin margaritas, the whole thing with decorations and what not. mother loves throwing parties!!! it was fun my whole family was there, elys girlfriend, and our best friend matt came and celebrated his awesome occasion!!!

let the countdown begin.....

chirstmasssss

2012-01-08T13:59:00.000-08:00

Christmas is always a special one here at the hansgen residence! we always are happy, baking random things, finding the perfect gift, wrapping it, opening them and spending time with the people we love the most. this year i did the 12 days of christmas for cade, and he loved it! i was having such a hard time figuring out something to get him. he put in his mission papers a few weeks prior and at the time we had no clue where he was going or when he was going to be leaving. so i didnt want to get him anything that would just seem to go to waste, so i did the 12 days for him and it turned out great! here is the list of things i got him....
1-blanket. this was mainly for me because i hate all the blankets he has at his house
2-posters. the kid loves posters as well as decor for his walls at home. i got him a led zepplin one and a sweeeeet bob marley one.
3- i got three of my favorite memories of us, got a picture from each one, and wrote why i loved each one so much.
4- shirts-cause i love buying him cute clothes
5-arizona teas, cause hes in love
6-a mini six pack of soda for lunches at work and such
7-ties- for the mission. he always makes comments about how all his ties are the same so i got him some different ones!
8-pairs of church socks- one in every color possible
9-we were supposed to go on a date at 9:00, but then i got too excited so we did it at like 5...for our date we made a sweet gingerbread house!!!
10-we both have an obseshhh with incense so i bought him 10 things of them and a sweet holder.
11-i wrote him a huge long letter about the 11 reasons why i love him
12-he was going to star valley so i made him 12 cookies to take down there... other then it was more like 12x10.... ahhahah thats okay right?

anyways, nothing big but it was so fun sneaking them into his house everyday, so that usually when he came home, there was a surprise waiting for him :) as for me, my christmas was awesome! i got a laptop!!!! i wanted one so bad but i was almost positive i wasnt going to get it! such a good surprise! everyone in my family loved my gifts, what else is new though right?! anyways, it was such a good and happy time for me :) i hope everyone else's was awesome as well!!!! merry merry xoxoxstevie

we get pj's every christmas eve, this year they were legit long johns. ive never been more happy in my life!

best dog in the world!!!!

making some sweet tunes with my gramps christmas days visit!

me, trying so hard to talk father into letting me get a puppy of my own.... fail.

anyone needing an extra boost?

2011-12-14T20:53:00.000-08:00

the ultimate 12 days of christmas thank you emma russell!!!

sjkdhg

2011-11-27T12:52:00.000-08:00

its easier to update with you all with pictures vs words. i hope everyones thanksgiving was as fantastic as mine, happy holidays :)

questionair

2011-11-14T22:19:00.000-08:00

Who was the last person you had a serious conversation with?my dearest erica at school! we always have sensational talks about life and what not...

Has anyone said they loved you today? multiple people actually. mother, ely kenz, erica and cadence

Is someone on your mind right now? my brother whos just creepin on me from the other room being a weirdy.

Last person's bed you were on other than yours? mother and fathers. i sluffed church to read... fail.

If you had to get another piercing (not ears) what would you get? nose, call me a weirdo but i think they are gorg!!! i dont know if i could exactly pull it off with my strange honker but i like to think i would look fantastic.

Do you care if people smoke around you? meh, not really. its just whatever. my close family members smoke and i dont seem to mind most of the time. if it starts getting to me i either tough it out because we're in good convo or just slide on out of the premises.

Have you ever been really good friends with someone, but now you're just friends? hasnt everyone? i had friends in high school that i thought i would never dream to lose contact with and even just being out for two years i rarely talk to and when i do bump into them, its like we are meeting for te first time. i think im in an odd stage in my life when im finally being shown into the real world where you dont just get to hang out with friends all the time. i look at my parents and they have 6 friends MAYBE not even that, that they keep in on-and-off contact with. i think i know the friends i will carry on with me and thats that. wow, that was a rant.

What's your favorite color? i love the colors grey and black, people say that those arent colors but boo to them. i love the color peach though!!!

Who did you last call on the phone? ely

What was the last thing you drank? water. its usually a rare occasion that i drink anything but water.

What was the last song you heard? young blood by the naked and famous... PLEASE listen! its the best!!!!!

Who was the last person that made you cry? just myself. sometime life can get so frustrating. dont you ever feel that way? sometimes i feel like im just being swallowed in my stupid choices or just different circumstances and i tend to think sometimes "okay, seriously. this. is. not. FAIR!!!!" but then again there's always going to be someone better and always someone worse off then you are. i always try to remember that. i got my email from the universe today and it was seriously EXACTLY what i needed to hear....

Ever wish for do-over days, Stevie?
You know, hit the reset button and give'er another shot?

Cool.... Will today work!?Stevie, they're all do-over days, you're a forever being, and whatever you once dreamed of for yourself, I still dream of for you.

It's never too late,

The Universe

fun birthday happenings

2011-11-13T22:57:00.000-08:00

Birthday!!!! Aahh hbest day ever! I love my birthday every year! Its such a happy day and I get to spend it with all of the people I love most! Family, best friend, the boyf… everyone!!!! This year I turned the big 20… weird. No longer a teen suffix…. Man! But yeah it was a ssuper day! I had school early so I didn’t get to sleep in L but I got to see my friends at hair school which is always fine and dandy! I got home from school and my parents took me to shop and have fun in park city! Loved it! I got more fun clothes which is never a bad thing… I got back from pc and opened my presents which were all fantastic! After that I went to my favorite place ever, FastKart! Super fun, I came in third which I was mad about for like 15 minutes but then got over it quickly! Then the next day I woke up and went and hung out with my friend liz! We went to the mall and such for a little bit and then I got sick of it cause I hate shopping 89% of the time so I was kind of over it pretty quick but I enjoyed spending time with her! I went home, took a nap, hung out with ely for a little bit and then went off with my friends kate, kirst, kenz, liz and eliza and they took me to one of my faves the dodo for dinner! After we ate there paul, cade, matt, myles, and chase came over and we hung out and just chilled at my house! Then Sunday my gramps came over for dinner and we watched a movie and just hung out! So basically my birthday was amazing and I loved it! I didn’t go out and do crazy things but sometimes just not having to work and relax at my home is all I need!!!!

so yummy!!!

mother sid and i

the only picture we got at fast kart :(

kenz, kirst, myself, kate, liz and eliza

bestfriend kate, loveee her :)

Now these are just random happening since I last blogged. First ones are of my brother in his shopko get-up…. Hes adorable but that job lasted maybe 3 weeks. He already quit cause he hated it…. Hes a brat. Hahah and the photobooth ones are from our friends wedding reception we went to this past Friday! I honestly could have stayed in that thing for days… I love them!!!! Anyways, enjoy and have a good week! J

hw2011

2011-11-03T15:23:00.000-07:00

fun things have happened since i have last blogged about actual things!!!! i went to the blue scholars concert... AMAZING!!! love them... forever and ever and ever...... if you havent ever heard of them heres a link for you to checckkk em out :)

one of my favorite songs by themmm...

paul, caleb and buck in the back and madison and myself. soo happy :)

during their last song everyone crowded the stage... did we push to the front.. yep!!!!

another thing we did was carved pumpkins.. such a joyous and festive activity for halloween!!! my family and i didnt carve together this year for the first time since EVER so it was kind of weird but super fun to do with my best friends cadence and matthew! they turned out pretttty sweet.....

matts, mine (mike wazowski) and cades!

next thing on our list was to check out the new salt lake haunted house attraction, fear factory! it was unlike any haunted out i have ever been it! super detailed and unique.,. it wasn't very scary though :( oh well it was a great time had by all that went :)

cade, myself, bethany, matt, tyson, kalee, her husband, her cousins... i cant remember names very well dangit!

my fun esthetics friends that i just happened to run into down there! super fun :)

the last thing we did was go to fun parties! this one in particular was cades sister and brother in laws halloween party that was super fun!!!!

kayla and i

mario and peach :)

easy a chic and the blue devil mascot

way fun week was had by myself and everyone i was around!!! tomorrow is my birthday and i couldn't be more excited :) im so grateful for all the fun times i have been able to have with my family, friends, and everyone in between :)

anyway

2011-10-17T22:24:00.000-07:00

"People are often unreasonable and self-centered.
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives.
Be kind anyway.
If you are honest, people may cheat you.
Be honest anyway.
The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be good enough.
Do good anyway.
For you see, in the end, it is between you and God.
It never was between you and them anyway."

whale v dolphin

2011-10-17T11:15:00.000-07:00

(via honey-and-bee)

A while back, at the entrance of a gym, there was a picture of a very thin and beautiful woman. The caption was “This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?”
The story goes, a woman (of clothing size unknown) answered the following way:
“Dear people, whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, seals, curious humans), they are sexually active and raise their children with great tenderness. They entertain like crazy with dolphins and eat lots of prawns. They swim all day and travel to fantastic places like Patagonia, the Barents Sea or the coral reefs of Polynesia. They sing incredibly well and sometimes even are on cds. They are impressive and dearly loved animals, which everyone defend and admires. Mermaids do not exist. But if they existed, they would line up to see a psychologist because of a problem of split personality: woman or fish? They would have no sex life and could not bear children. Yes, they would be lovely, but lonely and sad. And, who wants a girl that smells like fish by his side? Without a doubt, I’d rather be a whale."

kjashdkfjhsad

2011-10-17T11:07:00.000-07:00

What time did you go to sleep last night? hmm... like 12ish!?

Do you enjoy long car rides? blah. no. i dont like being in a car, plane, anything smallish for more then about 3 hours. after that i have to mentally talk myself out of being a stress ball.

Are you listening to anything right now? just me type type typinnn away

Has a rumor been spread about you? Yeah. Whatevsss

Do you like funny or serious people better? funny, cause its way more fun butt I like people who know when its time to be serious about things yanno!?

Who was the last male you talked to? My boss sterling

Who is someone that can always make you laugh? Cadence, carter, berrett, matt, maddi

What were you doing at 10am this morning? working

What were you doing an hour ago?watching p.s. i love you.

Do you plan on moving within the next year? Yessss J more details so soon come in due time.

Are you wearing anything on your feet? My favorite blowfish boots actually.

What are you looking forward to in the next 3 months? My birthday! Christmas! Being done with school yeayyayyayya!

Do you remember your dreams? Sometimes I write them down right when I wake up so I can remember to look them up online and interprate wqhat they mean but when I get around to doing it whatever I wrote down usually doesn’t make any sense so I say screw it! hahaha

Where did your last hug take place? on my front porch last night

Have you been to a baby shower? Yeah yeah for some reason I think they’re awkward.

What cell phone company do you use? verizon.

Do you watch the Super Bowl? yeeees!

What about World Cup? Only cause cadence does.

Do you sleep with a teddy bear? hahah no, I'm not five.

What is the last movie you watched? What happens in vegas. What else is new though right!? ahhaha

What movie do you think everyone should watch? Ah to be a better person and put things into perspective I think the movie Blow is realllllly good. Also boy in the striped pajamas and Up. I always like movies with good messages.

What is your middle name? zel

Do you have your future children's names picked out? who yeeeeepp! All 6 of them good grief

What color is your mailbox? Fade-ish black

Do you have to drive over a bridge to get home? YES! Ah so weird, ive never noticed that before.

What brand is your computer printer? epson.

How many cars can fit in your driveway? Technically 2 but my dad has so much ish that we can only fit one

Who was your Kindergarden teacher? Mrs Bailey.

do what you do

2011-10-16T23:59:00.000-07:00

right above it

2011-10-16T23:52:00.000-07:00

so what do you know cade goes out of town, so its time for me to have a good time! hahah jk i have fun with him but i got to go out and be crazy fun! but yeah i didnt do much honestly. i went and had a lot of fun on friday with friends going back and forth to travis, then to kaysons and back and forth. fun times.... as you will tell below. saturady maddi and i went and visited them up at the dunes all day and then came home. i didnt feel good so i just fell asleep at 11 on a saturday night. whoot whoot... the life of an almost 20 year old. sunday i went to church and mother spoke. it was awesome and then ate with cades fambam, went to a close family friends surprise birthday party (happy birthday eileen :) ) and then we went to the park and hung out. matt baur came over and we played one of my favorite games called spite and malice, super fun but then we just watched friends... which is alllwayys a good time! anyways, i missed cade but i like that we are both able to do our own things and have fun. he gets his wisome teeth out friday and then the papers will be sent... ah missions come to quickly :) happy first-of-the-week friends :)

i dont know why, but when im taking pictures via webcam, i always have to get a close-up like so.... oh brother.

love these chicassss

one of my brothers oldddd friends from way back when we used to hang out with the andersens. bubba zane ladies.. hes single :)

extremely interesting

2011-10-14T15:05:00.000-07:00

how interesting is that?! next time youre wallowing in self pity just remember that your sadness and those types of feelings are self-inflicted and you can either make yourself sad about it or, you can be strong and get over whatever has happened. easier said then done but i think i will always try and remember this.... wish me luck... happy friday everybody!

questionzzz

2011-10-14T15:02:00.000-07:00

Write about a time when you tried to help and ended up making things worse: hahaha probably everyday? no just kidding i think this happens to everyone more often then we think actually! i dont think anybody ever thinks "oh man, im going to do this for someone and then they are going to be screwed after" no no no. we always think that the words we say will help as well as actions, advice, etc. but im sure if things dont turn out the way the person would have hoped, we can get blamed for some things yanno?

Did you ever break an important promise: yes

Write about picking apples, berries, or other fruit or vegetables: we had an apple tree at my old house and my parents would have ely, sam and i pick up the apples that had fallen.... it seemed like it was THE WORST but in all actuality it only took about an hour (if that) hahaha

Write about being a misfit: i think from the end of my 8th grade year through the middle of my 9th grade year i just never really knew where i fit in... i was sick of my old friends but also felt like groups were complete so i didnt ever go out with any other people... it wasnt until taylor buck and i became best friends where i started to kind of feel like i was happy with the turn my life had taken.

Describe a car or bicycle accident you were in: when i was a jr in high school the drill girls had a group date and it was katie, connor, dani, russel, sean and myself and we were driving and long story short we ran into a telephone pole, and a transmitter box and it blew up underneath of us. not good at all.

Write about being friends with your brother/sisters: i love my brothers. they truly are the best ever. sam and i are closer just because we have similar interests and ely can be really hard to get along with just because hes so temperamental. but when ely wants to talk we can be super close as well. we all get so excited for each other when we succeed in something we love and we also push each other to be better. sometimes we argue, but dont all siblings?!

Write about wearing high heels or a necktie for the first time: ive yet to wear a necktie.... but high heels and i have a love-hate relationship. i love them! they are adorable on other people and i have some cute heels that would seriously make my outfits that much better... but im not that girl. i dont know why whenever i wear them out and about i feel as if i am trying too hard. its not like they hurt my feet or anything at all but i just dont get that dolled up to wear heels would be acceptable. my mother always comes home with super cute heels that are amazingly adorable but they sadly just sit in my closet :( also i dont go out to places where i need to be that fancy.... i dunno its just a weird thing for me i guess. one day, i hope i grow out of it!

describe

2011-10-14T01:14:00.000-07:00

bored and dont know what to blog about. im having a weird but good day and am feeling a mixture of emotions. school ending, cade leaving, a possible AWESOME experience literally thrown at me (more to come when more finalized later)...so im answering questions. enjoy or hate.

Describe a day at the mall: urgh. hell. seriously i am not a fan of going to the mall and meandering around. its a very RARE occasion when i wanna juts hang out at that place. it stresses me out. now, describe a day at nordstroms.... completely different story. i never leave empty handed... ever. and i actually went there today. bought three items that will be nice additions to my already fabbulous wardrobe

Describe your dream room: welll i guess it depends on what we are talking about here. bedroom? kitchen? bathroom? living room? i dont want to go through and name off what would make each of those rooms ideal so i will name off some things like i would like as a general rule for all of the above. clean. tidy. homey-i want it to be welcoming to all. earthy idk why i just love earth tones in houses. im not a huge fan of all white and black. and i also want to be able to feel like i can relax in any room.

Describe a day at the beach: fabulous and much needed. thats what one of my favorite things about lake powell was. we would wake up, pack a ton of food and just go bum it on the beach and hung out. theres just something fun, lighthearted and carefree about beaches and good company.

Describe a practical joke you played on a friend/family member: hahahahahahhahaha honestly too many to name. pranking was our middle name in high school and we loved it!!!! one that always comes to mind is when scott, kamron, lex and nikkie and i went and toilet paperd tayvia cary's car and then to her house..... got caught.... police came.... and we had to clean it up. honestly HILARIOUS!!!!!!!! omg i feel bad that we did it because ime sure she thought/thinks that we all hated her. we totally didnt it just happened that way and it was all too much fun!

Describe an unforgettable experience: wow toughie. i think the most unforgettable experience that i have ever had is when i finally found out what being a true friend meant. its such a hard thing to teach someone what that is and to also understand it yourself. i have been "friends" with people for 6+ years and am finally realizing that they would throw me under the bus to save themselves. it totally sucks. but i think i finally realize that i would rather have 5 friends i can count on every second of everyday without having to talk to them constantly... then have 200 friends that wouldn't care if i was there or not. i think that everyone learns that lesson eventually and i am glad im finally starting to realize those types of things.

suggestions for successsssss

2011-10-12T22:32:00.002-07:00

hair school

2011-10-12T22:32:00.000-07:00

many fun things have been going on in hair school lately. i have 400 hours left and i couldnt be more happy about it! seriously 2000 hours completed will be a huge accomplishment!!! i should be done in like decemberishhh but then i got an offer from this guy to do one on one classes with me to teach me more high style types of deals and i fould out that the classes can count towards my hours as well! ahh, so excited!!!! but anyways....liz, eliza and i went and helped do massages for an hour and got double hours so thats good! it was fun to just hang out because basically no one came to get a hand massage.... no big.

eliza, liz, myself and shelbs aka nightmare. (yes we do call her that to her face, its an inside joke aka she takes no offense)

cool liza

i love my asian eyes

:( kirsty's last day. im soooo sad shes leaving me!!!!

kirsty, myself, paige, erica and heather

prettty slickkkerz

besssty kenzz at slcccc-erooo

memory grove

2011-10-12T22:20:00.000-07:00

a few days ago, cade, mother, father and i went to memory grove on a fantastic sunday afternoon and had a grand old time walking around.... it was so pretty. i suggest it to everyone... enjoy pictures. (father was playing with my camera so whoopsies on awkward photos!)

happy way

2011-10-12T22:08:00.000-07:00

sometimes the hard was is really the easy way, and the slow way is really the quick way...
yet, sometimes surprises may remain forever unknown when one waits...and waits...for the quick and easy way to manifest.

choose the "happy way," and time wont matter.
-the universe

the whale

2011-10-08T11:33:00.000-07:00

If you read a recent front page story of the San Francisco Chronicle, you would have read about a female humpback whale who had become entangled in a spider web of crab traps and lines. She was weighted down by hundreds of pounds of traps that caused her to struggle to stay afloat. She also had hundreds of yards of line rope wrapped around her body, her tail, her torso, a line tugging in her mouth. A fisherman spotted her just east of the Farallon Islands (outside the Golden Gate) and radioed an environmental group for help. Within a few hours, the rescue team arrived and determined that she was so bad off, the only way to save her was to dive in and untangle her. They worked for hours with curved knives and eventually freed her. When she was free, the divers say she swam in what seemed like joyous circles. She then came back to each and every diver, one at a time, and nudged them, pushed them gently around as she was thanking them. Some said it was the most incredibly beautiful experience of their lives. The guy who cut the rope out of her mouth said her eyes were following him the whole time, and he will never be the same.

lovely

2011-10-03T00:18:00.001-07:00

http://positivepause.com/

yes yes YES!!

2011-09-27T15:16:00.000-07:00

powellapalooza, huge success!!!! so fun and just a fabulous experience. i met a TON of cool, awesome, down to earth, real people that i know i will never be able to forget! it was an awesome environment surrounded by awesome people and i got to experience it all with my best friend, and other friends that i knew before hand! quick run down day-by-day and then as promised, pictures :)

-monday-cade and i drove to page, az. the drive was nice and smooth. we stopped in fillmore and i introduced cade to the garden of eatin (a hansgen-lunt family must) and then went on our way to where the festival was. we got there super late but still managed to meet a lot of the peopple who were volunteering as well and enjoyed an awesome camp fire and swell company with all of them but because it was dark we met up with merrill and caleb and we just set out our sleeping bags and slept under the stars... fabulous!!!

cadence and i on our lovely drive down!!

-tuesday-we woke up right as the sun came up at about 6:45... yikes! hahah just kidding it wasn't really that bad! but we woke up and then we went to find a spot to camp. since maddi, paul, berrett and myles weren't coming until wednesday we were the ones who had to decide where to go, set everything up etc. (your welcome guys!) in the middle of setting everything up, cade, merrill and caleb had to start their volunteering... they told me to not worry about it until they got back but i couldn't resist. i set up the tent all by myself!!!!! proud moment for stevie, plus 12 stars! i kind of started feeling sickish in the stomach so basically i just would fall asleep, wake up, drink water, fall back asleep. i started getting sick of it and hot so i made myself get up and drive to the lake so i could read my book i had started reading. i ended up falling asleep at the beach and coming back to camp to wait for cade to be done so we could get me some medicine. he took forever but we went and got some medicine and some sprite and went to bed and i felt better in no time!

this was our spot BEFORE everyone got there. i didnt get a good picture of everyone in the middle of the festival. you could barely see our spot, there were people camped all over the valley and up on the rocks in this picture!!!

-wednesday- thats when i started volunteering i basically just told the vendors where to set up and it was super easy. sat in the shade and met some fun people! after we both got done cade, myself, merrill, caleb, noah, and adam all went to shower in the lake. it was super over due. we hung out around the fire and waited for the rest of the crew to get there. they didnt get there until 4 am but it was super good to talk for a second and then just fall back asleep

-thursday- hung out, went to a cool spot in the lake. it was a cove type of thing and no one was there! pure awesomeness. we came back to camp, ate and kind of took it easy because the music started that night. the music started at 4pm and went until 6am WOWWWWW! they had this one band with fire dancers and i couldn't stop watching!!! it was so fun, like i said before awesome people and fabulous energy!

my friend tennysha (white dress) came down with her friends (everyone else) they dressed up every night! it was funny!

i miss her!!!

waiting for another concert to start

myles, caleb and part of berret haha

myself and merrill

just being himself haha

-friday-same thing. we went to the lake... my floaty didn't work... awesome. so funny but kind of awful at the same time! but we just hung out and then went to concerts. before the shows started, we went on a hike up this mesa that was down psycadelic hallway and up above all the camps and such. the picture i took do not do it justice, it was so cool! i haven't ever hiked a mesa before and it was weird because once we were on top of it, it felt like we were just on flat ground not on top of anything because its so flat! but yeah, friday was the night when people under the stairs played, it was soooo sick!!!!

this was when people started to come and camp. more people came everyday to the festival. it was PACKED!!!

beautiful!!!

people under the stairs

-saturday-we went to a wake boarding competition and to the beach stage! it was super awesome you could hang out in the water and still watch the bands and such it was super fun!!!! it also was the last night and it was the best! slightly stoopid played. i had already seen them and they played an awesome show, but zion i played later that night and it was AMAZING! seriously blew my mind. i love live music and this was definantly one of my favorite shows! they were awesome performers and did just an all around fabulous job! after that we went back and had a HUGE bonfire in a little ravine past our camp a ways and just hung out.

slightly stoopid

waiting for zion i to start

cade loves his mustache, if you see him... please tell him how awesome it is....

AMAZING show!!!! so much fun!!!!

-sunday- packed up and went on our marry ways! on the way back cade and i stopped at a huge dam, it was amazing! but the festival, oh man!! it was so fun and im so glad we all were safe and had a good time!!!

east of eden

2011-09-26T10:54:00.000-07:00

"And this I believe: that the free, exploring mind of the individual human is the most valuable thing in the world. And this I would fight for: the freedom of the mind to take any direction it wishes, undirected. And this I must fight against: any idea, religion, or government which limits or destroys the individual."

round two

2011-09-19T08:51:00.000-07:00

yesterday (sunday) i got invited to go to the state fair... i had already been but decided, why not?! after a few of us stayed at our friend connors house to watch the new snowboarding movie the art of flight... seriously amazing! i dont snowboard but when i watch movies like this the whole time im thinking, "Dang!!!! i must try!!!" my friend actually is selling me her board, bindings and boots for $100, not bad AT ALL! so im gonng give it a try this seasons... im sure i will let you all know how it goes... ahhahahaa anyways, i came to post pictures of the fun extravaganza at the fair, but then realized i hadnt posted about when cade and i went earlier this week. we leave for powell in an hour or so and im so stinkin excited. i didnt get much of a summer vay-k but now i will be able to! i deserve it so whatever!!! ahah anyways, im excited and im going to have a blast. wish me a safe trip full of unexpected adventures... namasté!

sooooooo long! it went up to our knuckles!!!

I LIVE FOR FUNNEL CAKE!!!!!

HATED ME! we were turned around by his cage after looking at him and talking to someone and it came behind and tried to get threw the bars to peck at me... jeeeeeze!!!

super fun together at ze fair

we all had a fun time togeth!!!

.... they had to put this sign up because people were putting children into the animals pens.. wtf!!!!

holy war

2011-09-18T15:30:00.000-07:00

okay so i guess everyone can shoot and kill me now for saying this but i could care less about byu and utah. let me explain.... i love college football. i watch college football. i do not follow college football. i have a usc hat because its cute, usc is a good team but i could care less about stats and i dont know one name of anyone who plays on the team... whoops. byu was supposed to win, i wanted utah to win but could care less either way. here are some pictures of what we were doing while watching the game.....

he wanted a picture of his mustache....good grief

fabulous thoughts from the universe

2011-09-17T02:17:00.000-07:00

ironically, those who label others as selfish are actually concerned with their own well-being.
This is good for a number of reasons, including learning the virtue of it. Besides, depending upon others to live "unselfishly" is still depending upon others

-the universe

niffty isn't it? how in life you don't even have to know how you got where you are, in order to get where you want to go. and then, well live your little heart out...

think, think, and let go---

-the universe

powelllalaaa

2011-09-15T11:19:00.000-07:00

FA LA LA LA LA-LA LA LA LA! lake powellll, its here. finally here. so excited. fun times to be had and spent and shared with friends, new people, music, lake, warmth, sun. YES! im there. so there! i still have lots to be getting off and doing but i cant stop just being excited. there i said. it. whahooo! these are all pictures from page arizona that i will be full on seeing with my two eyeballies. yayaya

relate

2011-09-14T00:58:00.002-07:00

Can you relate?
You sit in your towel after a shower because you're too lazy to get dressed. You and your best friend can say one word, and crack up. You hate when one string of your hoodie is longer than the other. You hate it when people think you like someone when you clearly don't. You hate it when your favorite song comes on, as you pull into the driveway. You feel like if you turn on the lights, you will be safe from anything. You push those little buttons on the lids of fast-food drinks. You laugh until people get hurt, then stop when you realize it's serious. You hate it when parents get serious about something funny you tell them. You hate when you tell a guy to shut up and they copy you in a higher voice. You pretend to sleep when your parents come in. You text the person next to you things that you can't say out loud. You hate when people in front of you walk really slow and you can't get past them. You're always tired no matter how much sleep you get. You stop the microwave before it hits 00:00 to avoid hearing the beeps. You use the "sup" head nod. You just did the nod after you read it. You hate when you are mad at someone and they make you laugh. You check the fridge every ten seconds to see if food magicallyappeared

airborne

2011-09-11T01:56:00.000-07:00

dont you just love nights that you dont know how they will end up being and then they turn into one of the funnest nights you think youll ever have? welp, it happened tonight! i worked today from 8am-7pm (open to close) and it was crazy! i was super tired and looked at my phone... it was only 11. i couldnt believe it. it was a super long day at work and cade and i had decided the night before (friday) that we wanted to get some people together to go to Airborne. so i got to thinking during my shift i was like man, i do not want to go tonight!! the last thing i want to do is bounce bounce around with people running everywhere giving me all sorts of headaches. but then as the day went on i thought to myself, no! you eserve a fun night and if you runn around and sweat a little bit that will make you sleep that much better tonight hahaha so i texted my friend kate to come and of course she was down! anyways all the people who ended up going were myself, ely, cade, kate, sean, andy, haley, josh myles and a girl he brought.,.. i want to say her name was trisha? ah i dunno... anyways a bunch of us ended up going and i couldnt have had a better night! we did everything! playing dogeball is my favorite... i get a little riled up... lets just leave it at that! hahahah anyways, here are some pictures from my adventure! im hoping every ones saturday was as fun as my own :)

ely and torg

this kid was my nightmare. he seriously probably was as tall as my foot to my kneecap and had about enough sass in him to blow up a submarine. lets just say, he did not play by the "on your honor" system.

chuckin the ball at someone

some of us after. it was a super good time :)

little pick-me-ups

2011-09-08T13:45:00.000-07:00

everyone gets into that rut in a week when you think, WHEN WILL THIS EVER BE OVER? this week has been short until today and it just seems to be dragging. here are some funny things for those who needs a good smile, laugh, chuckle, what have you :)

seriously makes me laugh everytime i see this!!!

my brother ely and i are going to try and make these :)

creep-radiohead.... get it?

uhmmm, missed this infomercial.

...okay